Spiritual Wellness Check: Lessons from 3 John
In the northernmost county of England sits Alnwick Garden, a beautiful national treasure visited by people from across Europe. While most of the garden displays stunning flowers and plants, one section stands out—surrounded by foreboding black iron gates with a sign that reads “These plants can kill.” Inside this Poison Garden are 100 of the most poisonous plants in the world, appearing just as beautiful as the rest of the garden but harboring deadly danger.
This contrast between beauty and poison mirrors the message of 3 John, where we’re confronted with a choice between truth and deception, between godly and ungodly leadership.
What Is 3 John About?
3 John is a companion to 2 John—opposite sides of the same coin. While 2 John was written to a church warning them not to welcome false teaching, 3 John encourages an individual to welcome true teaching. The letter presents a spiritual wellness check through the stories of three individuals.
At just 219 words in the original language, this shortest book of the Bible delivers a powerful message about truth, hospitality, and godly leadership.
Who Was Gaius? A Model of Godly Leadership
The letter is addressed to Gaius, whom John addresses four times as “beloved.” When John writes, “I have no greater joy than this to hear of my children walking in truth,” it suggests Gaius was likely a convert of John’s.
John highlights three important qualities about Gaius:
- His soul was prospering – John prays that Gaius would “prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers.” This isn’t a prosperity gospel promise but a prayer that Gaius’s physical life would match his spiritual vitality. What if our physical lives reflected the condition of our spiritual lives?
- He walked in truth – John was “overjoyed when brothers came and testified” to Gaius’s truth. His reputation for integrity preceded him.
- He showed hospitality – Gaius had a reputation for welcoming believers, even strangers, into his home. John encourages him to continue this practice by supporting traveling ministers “in a manner worthy of God.”
By supporting these workers of the gospel, Gaius was participating in their ministry. Even if he couldn’t go everywhere they went, his support made him “a fellow worker with the truth.”
Who Was Diotrephes? The Danger of Selfish Leadership
In stark contrast to Gaius stands Diotrephes, described as a selfish troublemaker. John reveals several disturbing traits about this church leader:
- He loved to be first – Diotrephes craved preeminence and the limelight.
- He rejected apostolic authority – He refused to accept what John, the last living apostle, had to say.
- He spread malicious gossip – He unjustly accused John with malicious words.
- He was inhospitable – Unlike Gaius, he refused to welcome traveling ministers.
- He controlled others – He not only refused hospitality himself but forbade others from showing it, even excommunicating those who tried.
Diotrephes represents the self-appointed, self-promoting, self-indulging leader who uses authority to control rather than serve. His spirit threatens true spiritual leadership in the church.
Who Was Demetrius? An Example Worth Following
After showing us the negative example of Diotrephes, John introduces Demetrius as a godly example to follow. Though he gets only one verse, his character speaks volumes:
- He had “received a good testimony from everyone” – Everyone who knew Demetrius spoke well of him.
- Even “the truth itself” testified to his character – His life aligned with Scripture.
- John personally vouched for him – “We testify also, and you know our testimony is true.”
If someone were to describe your life in one sentence, what would they say? Demetrius reminds us that a good reputation is built daily on good habits exercised consistently.
How Should We Choose Our Influences?
The central command of 3 John comes in verse 11: “Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but what is good.” This is the heart of the letter. The word “imitate” comes from the Greek word from which we get “mime.” We’re called to carefully consider who we allow to influence us:
- Who speaks into your life?
- After whom do you pattern your life?
- Who do you listen to?
- Who do you spend time with?
- Who do you follow on social media?
John warns us to be careful about our influences because they will eventually shape how we think, speak, and behave.
Why Does This Matter?
John gives us three reasons to follow good examples:
- It honors God (v.6) – When we’re faithful, we bring glory to God’s name.
- It’s part of our obedience (v.7) – Those who went out “for the sake of the name” were being obedient to their calling.
- We participate in God’s work (v.8) – By supporting those doing good, we become “fellow workers with the truth.”
While 2 John warns us what not to do so we don’t participate in evil, 3 John encourages what we should do so we can participate in good. Our faith should travel farther than we can personally go.
Life Application
The story of Tim Johnson, a baseball manager who built his career on fabricated Vietnam war stories, reminds us that character eventually reveals itself. When his lies were exposed, his career ended because his character couldn’t live up to who he claimed to be. 3 John calls us to a spiritual wellness check. Consider these questions this week:
- Who am I imitating? Take inventory of your influences. Are they leading you toward truth or away from it?
- Is my soul prospering? What would it look like if your physical life matched your spiritual condition?
- How am I showing hospitality? Who can you welcome, support, or encourage this week?
- Am I walking in truth? Are you living with integrity in all areas of your life?
This week, commit to being more like Gaius and Demetrius than Diotrephes. Choose to imitate what is good, welcome those who serve the truth, and live in a way that honors God. Remember that living the truth matters—not just knowing it.
